So, my life is good. Really good:)
School is still going crazy, I'm pretty sure I failed my math test... but its all good baby. Haha I woke up in a good mood this morning. Its one of those "I'm glad to be alive" days.
If I had one song to describe my life right now it would probably be Everybody's Changing by Keane (Fun Fact: I got the sheet music for this song...and I shall attempt to learn it. I hate sight reading. Ugh.) I discovered this song and band by accident really. Thank you Pandora! Haha. I am now in love with this song and band. For some reason my favorite bands all seem to be from Britain. Curse you Brits! ;)
Anyway, the song kind of explains how everyone is changing, their lives are moving in different directions and the singer doesn't feel the same way.
Well, most days thats how I feel.
All my life my best friends have been guys, literally since pre-school.
Its been that way up until this semester.
Last semester my very best friend was a guy and although I had lots of lady friends I only regularly hung out with 4-5.
Well this semester I'm not hanging out with guys at all really. I study with a couple different ones for different classes, but none of them are my best friends like I want.
There's some sort of connection I feel with a guy best friend that I don't with girls. I'm not very close to my real brothers so I tend to adopt guys as surrogate brothers, and I love that. I love brothers! Even with everything they put me through.
This semester I feel like I don't have any brothers. I mean I have guy friends and stuff but I don't hang out with them outside of school at all and probably never will.
But I am thankful for the sudden burst of girl friends. I never knew how many people really cared about me before. Now I find myself always with one girl or the other, and I actually love it.
Another reason I usually hang out with guys is because for most of my life I have been highly intimidated by girls. I didn't know how to act around them or talk to them or anything. I grew out of that stage awhile ago but I am still nervous around girls sometimes haha. Guys are much easier to read for me.
Girls are lots of emotions and feelings and half of them are hidden.
I miss my guys, I miss the fact that they would make me laugh until I couldn't breathe, and then continue until I almost pass out. Haha I have the best memories from my guys.
But I feel like I have entered a new era of Ducky.
I am friends with more girls than I can count and I feel genuinely loved by all of them. I trust them and I know they're there for me. They're like my safety net so to speak. This was an unwanted change but its a GOOD change. My life is good. I am blessed. My parents love me. My friends love me. My God loves me. And my dog Mollie loves me. Hahaha:)
Life will never be more than we can handle.
I love knowing that.
So if you're blue today...go ahead and be blue today. It's healthy to have a meltdown every once in a while.
But tomorrow: smile. Get down on your knees and pray. Do something for someone else. Do what you can to help your family. Don't forget where it all came from. And finally, love people. Just love them. Because in the end thats all you can do. Anything you do for people starts with loving them. Sometimes thats all you can do for them. And sometimes thats all we need. Just love us.